I'm Happy

i've just come from back from taking Nate home.
And i'm going to say something
that i haven't said in a really (REALLY) long time.

i'm happy.

i think it's because i've come to terms
with everything that's happened to me.
i've stopped blaming circumstance and coincidence
and i've finally faced the fact that
whatever i've gone through,
it was because of the choices i made.
and i think it was that realization
that made things click.

i've learned that ---

1. although i don't always get what i want,
what i have can be enough.
2. looking and not touching can be a good thing.
3. wanting something more is a good thing
--- if done realistically.
4. when god closes a door and shuts the window,
there's always the doggie door! Wink
5. i am NOT super Chris
and no one expects me to be super Chris.
6. i am loved (and now i REALLY know this,
and the knowledge isn't just superficial now.).
7. nothing is ever perfect
-- but it's in the appreciation of imperfections
that one finds the magic in life.